I've noticed a trend in my romantic relationships, where my partner has low self esteem, I truly believe in them and offer them support and encouragement to achieve their goals. I put a lot of time and effort into this 'cause I love them and think they are special, talented, am sad that they don't see this, etc. And, it's not just me who offers them support and encouragement, other people do this too.
No partner has ever done this for me. Like them, I have dreams, aspirations and self doubt too. No one is pushing me to achieve them, though. Maybe because I am not as vocal about self doubt?
I don't even know if I can really fault them? Like, they are so worried about their own (perceived) inadequacies that they don't move on to thinking beyond themselves.
I guess what I am wondering is, is it reasonable to let a partner with low self esteem be selfish(?) with regard to taking support. I don't even know if selfish is the right way to frame it... Just, it's as if it hasn't crossed their mind to give me a pep talk about my future? Though, this is something I do for them often.
I suppose I should mention how I am feeling about this to them, but wonder if it will just make them feel worse about themselves.
I'd like it if they could support me back in a similar way on occasion? But maybe I should just look for this kind of support from other sources?
I'm leaning towards the later, 'cause not everyone is good at/able to give that kind of support. Or even safer maybe trying to minimize relying on external encouragement all together.
IDK just feeling a bit burnt out of offering support for life goals and not getting anything comparable back...
Anyway, typing this out has been therapeutic.